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« Lucia Loves Alan | Main | Osmund is not a Sexist »
Monday
Oct152007

Athena is a Lesbian

Athena is a lesbian, although she is only attracted to men.  

I met Athena in the hallway on the 28th floor last week. She's very striking, with dark hair and dark eyes. I asked her what she did for the company and she told me she was a graphic artist. I immediately made up a reason to meet with her. I told her that I'm working on an application that involves media asset management, which will include all the proprietary graphics currently created and owned by the company. This actually is one of the technology projects currently slated for '08, it just doesn't happen to be mine. Regardless, I pretended it was mine and I asked if we could meet so that I could get her perspective on the project as an artist and future user.

We met in 3402. She was a little worried because she had heard the conference room was haunted. I assured her it was only slightly haunted, and never on Mondays.

Since Media Asset Management was not really my project, I had nothing to say about it. I kept the conversation strictly personal.  

I told her that she had a unique look. That's when she told me she was a Lesbian. I was surprised, but not disappointed. Men love lesbians. And I'm a man. And although a man has a better chance of carving an ice sculpture in hell than hooking up with a lesbian, his hope for the impossible always overshadows his rational side. 

"When did you realize you were a lesbian?" I asked.

"From birth," she said.

"So you've always been attracted to women?"

"No, I've never been attracted to women."

I was surprised again. I wasn't sure if I was disappointed now though or not. And I was definitely confused.

"Then why are you a lesbian?" I asked.

"It's not a choice. I was born that way."

"But you're not attracted to women."

"Not in the least."

"Are you attracted to men?"

"Absolutely."

I scratched my head and looked at her sideways. I asked her if she'd have a drink with me after work. She said she'd love to.

Maybe a man can hook up with a lesbian after all.

Reader Comments (30)

I encounter the similar situation. Now I feel very sad because she left me and wanted to live with her true love. In fact I knew she was a lesbian before we got married. Just because I loved her so much and she was only attracted to men but not women. We have two chirldren within 3 years, but unfortunately she suddenly told me she wanted to leave us and live with another lesbian she met on http://www.lesbianconnect.com. Since I love her so much and she has found her true love, I should not blame her. I know we should cherish the true love, so I let her go without any complaint, just be very sad in my heart but not regret it.

November 26, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterBrian

That sucks dude. But it's no reason to be a buzz kill.

November 26, 2007 | Registered CommenterJason X

hahaha I love it. I hope you managed to get some Lesbian lovin'.

December 17, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterhatt

Duh, SPAM comment #1!

December 17, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterDuh!

#1 - How is your experience remotely similar to the post? Maybe because you both refer to women. Now that I think of it, I've had a similar experience. My mom is a woman! Hey, so is my wife! What a bunch of strange coincidences we've all had!

December 17, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterRance Mohanitz

Rance - NICE! lol

December 17, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSeriously

a man i once knew told me about the lesbians with the clit rings, that he had slept with...
i've yet to meet someone who has carved a ice sculpture in hell though

December 18, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterme

this is dumb

December 18, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterno

The one and only time I was "struck by the thunderbolt" ie: love at first sight, was with a Lesbian.We met eyes at a craft fair-I was selling for a friend, she created. We looked at one another and fell in Love. We got together and compared lives.And bodies. She had never been attracted to men. She broke up with her lover over me-violently. We were not very compatible out of bed. We broke up after 4 months of trying. She married a Mormon man and had two children, left him and disappeared from contact with me.One unique experience!

December 18, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterEegon

Uhhhhh. Okay.

December 18, 2007 | Registered CommenterJason X

wow, the most amazing part of this post for me is the fact that everyone reading is apparently is an idiot. I get it. It is witty and fun, and yay Lesbos...you gotta love a woman who'll use the pun inherent in her birthplace to its full potential!

December 18, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMegan

I think you can remove that first commment as spam, or possibly someone who hasn't a clue about what you wrote.

December 18, 2007 | Unregistered Commenteryes

This reminds me of a story. I had a hamster who i think was a lesbian, as it was a female and humped other female hamsters. One day it snapped, killing its lezbo lover, leaving a bloody matted mess in the corner. I walked in to see her drenched in blood, trying to gnaw her way out of its cage.

+1 relevancy points

December 19, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterChacta

Very nice! There've certainly been enough jokes at the name of that island, but I don't think I've ever heard one propagated by an actual inhabitant of the place until now. Nice story.

December 19, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterneminem

It's not often that I really, actually, 'laugh out loud' on the internet, but this one did it. Great stuff!

December 22, 2007 | Unregistered Commentermooster

My corporate job makes me laugh every day. I figured I'd share the entertainment... Thanks for stopping by!

December 22, 2007 | Registered CommenterJason X

At first, I thought he was gonna something about her being a guy...
See, the question came up the other day...
If you are a guy and want to become a woman, but you like women, are you "straight", or are you a "lesbian"?

December 26, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJimmy Neutron

Jimmy Neutron- Pre-op...straight but into cross dressing and things like that; Post-op...now you're a bonafied lezzie who wasted about $25 grand on non-sensical surgery!

December 27, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterRawDeal

According to urbandictionary.com, a male lesbian is a guy who likes poontang, but also likes Dawson's Creek equally. So basically, the guy is neither straight nor a lesbian, he's just a big fag. Not a fag in the homosexual sense, but a fag in the sissy sense.

December 27, 2007 | Registered CommenterJason X

Jimmy Neutron/RawDeal: It doesn't matter what level of physical transitioning a person has done; if they identify as the gender opposite what they were born and are actively seeking to become said gender, they are that gender, and the respectful thing would be to refer to them as such.

For instance, I am a transgendered male (female-to-male) and I'm gay. I'm a dude. I like dudes. The fact that I have XX chromosomes doesn't change this fact. I was a dude before I had chest surgery, and I was a dude before the hormones gave me these bitchin' sideburns. But either way, a transgendered person is just another person who happens to have had the birth defect of being born with the wrong bits.

...Er. Not that this is relevant or anything. I just found this via StumbleUpon and thought I'd toss in some clarification.

December 28, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterBasGad

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