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« Pangbourn | Main | Capital Expenditure Request »
Thursday
Sep132007

Conklin's Wife

Conklin's wife is a slut.

Conklin is a Licensing Manager and a good friend of mine, which is why I won't tell him that his wife is a slut.

Everyone knows that Conklin's wife is a slut but Conklin himself. He suspects she is a slut but will not admit it until he can witness her cheating first hand. He is obsessed with catching her in the act. She is obsessed with making him think that she's cheating without letting him catch her in the act. The more she denies, the more she leaves clues. The more he finds clues, the more he accuses. But for him, this is all just conjecture. As long as he doesn't know she's cheating, he won't leave her.

I would like to tell Conklin that his wife is a slut, but he will punch me in the eye if I do. I can only imply that she is a slut when he's really pissed off and ready to leave her because he almost caught her in the act. But I still can't call her a slut. Because he will inevitably be back to normal within a few days, more in love with her than he's ever been, and will remember that I called her a slut and will still punch me in the eye because I called her a slut.

Conklin will not cheat on his wife even though she is cheating on him. He has plenty of opportunity, but refuses to cheat on her. While he is spending a great deal of time not cheating on her, she is spending a great deal of time cheating on him. The more he doesn't cheat, the more she cheats. The time he could have spent cheating on her, is spent trying to catch her cheating on him. But the more she cheats, the more careful she is to just leave clues and not actual evidence. While she is a very slutty wife, she is not a stupid slut. And while she is not a faithful wife, she is a very dedicated slut.

On the other hand, my wife is not a slut. She will not have sex with anyone, including me. And while I would like to have sex with her, she would not like to have sex with me. Nor would she like to have sex with anyone. True, she did have sex with me the other day, but I'm sure she did not like it. And while she didn't like having sex with me, she did like the fact that we had sex. She cannot pretend to like sex during sex, but she can pretend to like sex after sex. I do not like having sex with anyone who doesn't like sex, which is why I don't have sex with my wife anymore. So when we had sex the other day, it was a surprise for both of us. But it was a bigger surprise for Blair. However, Blair chose to ignore what she inferred from the voicemail message my wife left the other day. If she did not ignore it, she would have to stop having sex with me. Because Blair would no longer have sex with me if she suspected I cheated on her with my wife. But if she stopped having sex with me, she would have to start having sex with her husband.

Ignorance is bliss and sometimes better sex.   

Reader Comments (1)

Hello, Very nice site. Universe help us, dont worry man.

May 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commentere494p3

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