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« HR and Candy Bars | Main | Alan Smithee »

Candy Bar Season

Is it candy bar season again already? Everyone wants me to buy a candy bar for their kid.butterfingerekm476x300ekm.jpg

Mulhausen came into my office today and asked if I'd like to buy a candy bar for a dollar to help his kid raise money for some Christian cause. I said sure and took one. He asked for the dollar and I said he could cover it himself, since he owed me a dollar for not swearing in my office.

Not long ago, I implemented the reverse swear jar to counter his traditional swear jar: if you don't use at least one swear word when you come into my office, you owe me a dollar. I told Mulhausen that if he used at least one foul word, I would pay him a dollar for the candy bar. However, I did warn him that given his kid's Christian cause, the Lord might view the dollar as blood money. He took his candy bar back and left my office.

Everyone seems to be selling the same generic chocolate bar for the same amount: 1 dollar. I decided to buy a box of Kingsize Butterfingers and a box of Kingsize Snickers for about $1.25 per bar. I put the two boxes out on my desk and made a little sign that asks for a $2.00 donation.    

Tefft came into my office with her box of candy bars and asked if I'd like to donate. I pointed to my sign and offered her one of my candy bars for two of hers. I could tell she was a Butterfinger person by the way her eyes lit up with an orange glow. She dropped two generic chocolate bars and snagged the Butterfinger and skipped away like she just got the bargain of her life. Meanwhile, her kid was two dollars short. 

Adler from the PMO stopped by, saw the sign and decided to donate two dollars for a Snickers bar. He said he likes to donate to worthy causes.

"By the way, what is the cause?" he asked as he was leaving.

"Cause?" I said. "I bought these candy bars for $1.25. Just trying to recoup my investment and make a profit."

Adler didn't like my response and asked for his money back. I regrettably informed him that as a matter of policy, there are no refunds. No exceptions.

I've already sold quite a few candy bars. But I've also received complaints that I'm stealing business from other people's kids. If I'm selling at a higher price point and still taking their business, those kids really should reevaluate the quality of their products.

I'm sure somehow this will all lead to another visit to HR. In the meantime, I don't have to buy candy bars from anyone in the office and I'm turning a small profit as a result.

Reader Comments (4)

Funny, I did that exact same thing! Except I actually did mention it was for a friend's kid. It was also a way to deter other people in the office from passing the candy envelope over my way since I was trying to do the same.

Well now they have moved on from candy bars to cookie dough tubs and wrapping paper! Why the fuck would I want to buy X-mas wrapping paper in the middle of Spring? Makes absolutely no sense!

Good luck w/ HR...AGAIN!!! =)

January 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTech Babe

Good plan, once they get addicted to those convenient snickers and butterfingers you can introduce stage 2, the mini bar scheme. Just drop off 5 bars in their office at the begging of the week with a price card (say $5 a bar) then collect at the end of the week!

January 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRelax

Relax, I like the way you think...

January 31, 2008 | Registered CommenterJason X

Every one love to eat chocolate. Billions of pounds of candy bars are consumed each year in America . If convert this into candy bar fundraising activity then more money can be achieved for helping many organizations(poor ones) .......

March 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterfundraiscandies

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