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« I'm Not the One | Main | The Big Night »
Wednesday
Feb202008

Conklin Tube

I really shouldn't post the film on Youtube...1538846-1358117-thumbnail.jpg

That would be mean. Cruel and demeaning. But also extremely entertaining.

It wouldn't last very long. I mean, it's some dirty shit. The kind of content they pull down real quick. Maybe I'll post on Youporn.com instead.

I gotta tell you, I can't wait to have sex with Blendi the Unvirgin. She is one wild-ass bitch in bed. You wouldn't think, with a former title like "Virgin". But the way she handles her mouth is exactly how she handles her body. Like a porn star. Her performance was more than suitable for celluloid. And every frame came out perfectly.

Conklin, on the other hand, was not picture perfect. Here's how it went down:

Once they got into the bedroom set, Blendi shed all of her clothes in less than 10 seconds, hopped onto the bed all excited like a kid ready for story time (probably not the most appropriate simile, but nothing in this post is appropriate). Conklin stood there with his mouth open, staring at Blendi's young, perfect virginal body and immediately pitched a tent. Then he sat down quickly, embarrassed that he had a boner.

"What's wrong with that?" Blendi asked. "Don't you need it if we're going to have sex?"

Excellent point. Although the answer wasn't immediately evident to Conklin.

Conklin is not a shy guy. He's not just confident, he's cocky. Which is odd that he would be married to such a slutty wife and let her treat him the way she does. It was also odd that he was so timid with Blendi. It took him a good twenty minutes to undress. But it wasn't that he was timid about having sex with Blendi for the first time; it was because this was the first time he was going to be unfaithful to his unfaithful wife.

The Camera crew, McKinney and I were all pulling our hair out waiting for him to commit to cheat and fuck the virgin. Like myself, I'm sure everyone wanted to scream out: Fuck her, you idiot! 

The anticipation was excruciatingly painful. 

Blendi finally sweet-talked him into dropping his pants, and once that happened, she was all over him and there was no turning back. I mean, at that point he didn't have a choice. She took the bull by the horns and wouldn't let go. There was nothing tender about it.

She looked like she was in a lot of pain at first, but that also seemed to turn her on. It just fueled her fire. And then she saw blood, and let me tell you, that made her go insane. If she wasn't already freaky enough, that sent her over the edge. 

Conklin was scared shitless.

At one point, Conklin's mobile phone rang and he got all tense and acted like he was actually going to answer it. Blendi wouldn't have it though. She slapped his face, rolled over on top and pinned him down. The phone just rang and rang and rang... His slutty wife probably just wanted to know how much time she had left to cheat on him.

I was perched behind a large wooden panel used as some sort of prop, and after a while my left leg fell asleep. That was not pleasant. Everyone was getting uncomfortable because this thing that didn't seem like it was ever going to happen now seemed like it was never going to end.

After a few rounds though, they finally called it a night. We were all relieved, but knew we had some great footage.

I watched dailies with McKinney on Saturday. Blendi was hot, Conklin was funny as hell. It's great shit. Which is why I can't keep this to myself.  

Once we edit and have a final cut, this will be posted for all to see. 

Does that make me a bad person?

Reader Comments (2)

Congratulations! Welcome a new member to The User Pool! Nice work Jason...are you really going to post the vid?

February 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTech Babe

listen Jason, i just read all of this stuff about me... you are in no way going to post that fucking video. i didn't think you really had that... that sucks man. don't post it, and by the way, i'm not FUNNY when i have sex.

Conklin

May 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterConklin

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