Latest Posts
Latest Comments

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

Blog Roll
« Stealing from the Company | Main | Can't Save Her Life, Can't Have Sex with Her »


Blair's breasts have been staring at me all day. 

I swear to God, her tits have eyes. She hasn't looked at me once, but I know she sees my every move. The only explanation I can think of is that her tits have eyes.

And it's like we've been having a staring contest the whole day. Her tits won't blink; neither will my eyes.

In direct line of my office, but down the hall is a machine used for high-speed scanning. I don't know what the fuck she's scanning, but she's been doing it all day.

I wandered over there at some point and asked her why she was doing it on my floor. She explained that the other scanner on the 27th floor was always tied up because of the Category coordinators.

Blair was very pleasant, which is how I knew she was not being friendly. When Blair is being friendly, she's not pleasant. She's actually mean, which is how I know she's being friendly. 

Her friend, Bendy Wendy, was watching me all day yesterday. Then I got that email from Blair accusing me of wanting to hook up with someone on my new floor. When I left for the day, I sent a casual message asking: and who would that be?

She didn't respond.

I think Maricruz was watching Blair's tits watch me all day too. At first, she believed Faudeux the cock-blocker when he said something was going on between Blair and me. But after the rumor mill destroyed his credibility, she no longer believed what was actually true. But with Blair's tits staring at me like a jealous girlfriend, I'm sure Maricruz got suspicious again.

So this was my dilemma: I'm sure Blair was on my floor today just to catch me talking to the woman she thought I wanted to hook up with so that she could say ah-ha! So I couldn't go anywhere near Maricruz. But if I didn't go talk to Maricruz while Blair was on my floor, Maricruz would assume it's because there's something going on between Blair and me.

As I sat in my office trying to work out my dilemma, Brandi walked in. Since she does so much work with Int'l Marketing, they moved her down here to. She welcomed me to the floor, we talked for a minute, then she cut me off and left the room. Like Melanie, I could tell she still thought I was suicidal and didn't want to linger too long for fear I might slit my wrists before she the conversation came to a natural end.

A moment later, Blair stood in my doorway with that ah-ha! look on her face. And then she walked away. Her work on my floor was done.

Wrong person, same outcome: Blair will be pissed at me for at least three days.

Well, at least I was able to go over and talk to Maricruz. I don't think she saw Blair's tits watching me today. And if she did, I don't think she cares anymore. I think she wants what she wants, and that's the end of that.

Reader Comments (4)

I knew all the tit watching couldn't be good. I'm glad you're on Twitter. I love the little updates during my daily watching of my friends' gossip.

August 19, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterWinter

Did you give her the ol' motorboat action?

August 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTech Babe

Yes, with the sound effects. She did not appreciate it.

August 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJason X

ROFL sounds like your job is a lot of fun and lot of people are involved. At my work all the ladies are like 15 years older so yeah no tits gonna follow me.

September 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAndrew

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>