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« How to Drive Your Boss Mentally Insane | Main | Jason's Spread Sheet »
Tuesday
Jan272009

Sext

Jeni-Fire and I are finally having sex. We're having safe sex. 

Text sex.

Jeni-Fire is not worried about disease or pregnancy; she's worried about Pangbourn blowing us up with a bomb. 

I'm not as worried about Pangbourn blowing us up with a bomb because I created a diversion with a Bonnie Bod scare. Now Pangbourn is more worried about being blown up with a bomb by Bonnie Bod than he is worried about blowing me up with a bomb. 

However, Jeni-Fire is still paranoid. 

So we fuck fuck fuck all day long on the phone through text messages. 

We also send each other photos. Some simple and innocent, others pornographic. I've got one pic of Jeni-Fire pissing in the bathroom. The pissing doesn't do anything for me, but I do have a shot of her pussy. And that does. 

So during budget meetings and technical reviews, I'm receiving messages that indicate all the dirty things she's going to do to me. And I respond with all the dirty things I'm going to do back. The people in the meeting assume I'm handling an important production issue. Good thing they can't see the tent I've pitched under the table.

Makes the meetings tolerable.

So today, in a meeting with Oracle reps, I get a photo of Jeni-Fire's naked body from the gym locker room after working out during lunch. Her tits are beautiful, her ass is hot, and in the background there's an elderly woman walking into the locker room with a shocked look on her face. I was turned on and laughing at the same time.

Sext messages with photos are the best.

Jeni-Fire is so fucking hot in bed. She'll do anything. According to her text messages. She loves every position and wants me to do the dirtiest things to her. She's the best I've ever had. According to her text messages.

This is the reason I'm in the field of technology. I have never fucked Jeni-Fire, but because of technology, I have fucked her seven ways from Sunday.

While I have prevented Pangbourn from blowing us up with a bomb, I somehow have to prevent Jeni-Fire from believing Pangbourn will blow us up with a bomb.

As good as sext is with Jeni-Fire, I really need to fuck her for real soon before I blow up like a bomb. 

Reader Comments (7)

I bet she has her phone set to vibrate.

January 28, 2009 | Unregistered Commenternadzb21

Yes, she does. She told me so. Buzzzzzzzz.

January 28, 2009 | Registered CommenterJason X

Heh. I know what happens next.

January 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Solution: Blow Pangbourn up with a bomb. Then she won't worry about Pangbourn blowing y'all up with a bomb. Start off with a stink bomb tho. At least it'll clear out the building, at which point...well, I'm sure you'd figure out something to do, Mr. X.

January 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShoe

Shoe: I like the way you think.

JasonX: Has she done__________________ to you? (*Check your sexts...)

January 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTech Babe

Get rid of Pangbourn. Text is best when it's one on one.

January 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSabina

Mike: What? What happens next?

Shoe: Pangbourn definitely needs to be blown up. But I need to get someone else to do it for me. Maybe Fiona the Cunt.

Tech Babe: No, she hasn't done *Blank* to me yet. Why don't you sext me, but leave out the blanks.

Sabina: Not that Pangbourn would be invited, but I've tried to have sext threesomes. Doesn't work. Yeah, one on one is best.

January 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJason X

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