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« Weekend in Vegas | Main | Intercourse is Gay »
Monday
May102010

Blair is Suspicious

Blair is suspicious because she thinks I'm not fucking other women in the company. Whenever she thinks I'm not fucking other women in the company is when she's most suspicious that I am fucking other women in the company.  Because she knows that if I were fucking other women in the company, she'd be the last to find out. 

So she came down to I.T. today for a little snap inspection. She did not know we hired a new temp. She took one look at Aimee the Temp and now believes that I'm fucking at least one other woman in the company.

If a hot temp starts working in I.T., Blair expects me to inform her immediately. If I do not inform her immediately, she believes it's because I'm trying to fuck the new temp. However, if I do inform her immediately that a hot temp has started working in I.T., she immediately knows that I think the new temp is hot, and therefore, I will try to fuck her anyway. 

There is no way to win at this game.

But the worst thing about Aimee the Temp is the fact that her tits are huge. 

Blair knows that she is the most beautiful woman in this company and always will be. And I agree that it would be very difficult to top Blair. But Blair knows that beauty is not always the deciding factor, even though it should be.

Blair knows that bigger tits will cloud men's judgment on the matter. And even though she is the most beautiful woman in the company, there are those who will get more attention than her because they have bigger tits. Like Aimee the Temp.

Blair stormed into my office like a pissed off badger. I asked Jason Y to give us a minute. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Or the natural disposition of a Finance manager. So Jason Y was more than happy to leave the room.

I've been dealing with Blair long enough to know exactly how to handle with this minor crisis.

I immediately disclosed the fact that Jason Y was going out with Aimee the Temp.

This is called, The Deflection.

Jason Y is a nice guy, which is why Blair has no interest in him. But if he starts dating a girl with bigger tits than her, she suddenly has interest.

"Why the fuck would he go out with her?" she snarled.

I couldn't think of one reason. But I could think of two.

"She looks like a little whore," Blair said. 

She acts like a little whore too. Monkey sex like you wouldn't believe.

"Well, I just lost respect for Jason Y," she said.

The truth is, she just gained respect for Jason Y. Nice guys don't fuck around with girls with big tits. Because the girls with big tits are too busy fucking around with guys like me. But if he is fucking around with her, that makes him seem more like a guy like me. And Blair likes guys like me. 

Well, the deflection worked. Except for the fact that Blair will now try to fuck around with Jason Y. 

My genius is my detriment. 

Reader Comments (7)

Happy Birthday Jason!

May 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

Well, this affair thingys are very entangling.

May 12, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternachete

Matt: Thanks! I got a really cool present. Multiple times.

Nachete: Yes, they are. I like to be entangled.

May 13, 2010 | Registered CommenterJason X

You are so damned amusing... I'm not working. (Why does your blog not like my blog? They are both about fucking.)

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDevilbluedress

I agree that huge breasts can definitely increase a woman's attractiveness. It's not the end-all/be-all, of course. If a woman is UGLY, it doesn't matter how big her breasts are. But if a woman is a 7 or 8, and has a huge, nice-looking rack, that could put her over a woman who is a 10 but only has an average-sized rack.

May 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJ.R. LeMar

JR: And extra points for natural big tits as opposed to modifications....

May 22, 2010 | Registered CommenterJason X

Eh. I'm no boob-snob. Real or Fake is not the main importance to me. As long as they look and feel nice, and I have access to them, that's all that matters.

May 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJ.R. LeMar

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